PRohm sent out an email, and I'm going. Check out the official blog of China stuff.

I didn't realize until yesterday when David, at work, said to me, "Kid, you look like you're not having a good time" that my face showed the stress of not knowing for those few days. I wasn't worried in the sense that Matthew talks about, but constantly having to explain things, speaking on Sunday, made me and my INFJ personality want to crawl into a hole. Wee bit of a tension headache. Pardon the bad sentences.

People were so overwhelmingly positive and encouraging--handing me business cards, directing me to idea A or B. I think I want to come back and go to Moody for International Studies and then take the TESOL certificate program at Wheaton. Chicago sounds so great.

I've been listening to Josh Bales at work. Yay.

Liv, we need to get going on the Nickel Creek tickets because by the time I get back, it will be getting later and later.

I'm leaving in 42 days. I can't believe how soon it is.

On the agenda:
- Leaving for CU Wednesday night.
- Training: Thursday-Sunday
- Visiting people in Ohio and Tennessee: Monday-Thursday
- Family reunion: Friday-Sunday
- Visiting Aurie Miller in Black Mountian, NC: Sunday
- Visit to Anderson: Sunday-Tuesdayish
- Nickel Creek Concert: :) August 3rd.
- Packing and getting ready until the 16th
- Taking Dwight to Cedarville: August 17th
- Leaving August 22!

I got to hang out with the one and only Beth the past two nights. I miss her so much. I am dead tired today, but it is so worth seeing her. Liv and Beth challenge me and prod me in ways that few people do, and I'm so thankful.

McDonald's has never been such a happenin' place at 11:30pm.

I am lazy right now, and I haven't been reading as much as I should. Grr.

Sleepy.

We had a giant, Barcroft reunion on Sunday. People screamed in for the 75th Anniversary Sunday and party. It made me sad. People who have been hurt and have left, came back, and it was good to see them, but a reminder that they aren't there anymore. I feel like "family" reconciliation should be a huge goal--no matter who does the offending. Brokenness made me cry--literally.

On the good side, the first part was basically a panel of our international members. Hearing their stories about life and circumstances and struggles was inspiring. I want to join their ranks. They talked about how they ended up overseas, and I just could see myself in their stories. I talked to Giselle about my upcoming venture to China and she was so full of wisdom about what's a head of me. I miss her daughter so much.

It will be good to see Aurie. Sweet, sweet lady. She has seen so much. She lived in China when China was a lifetime away from the rest of the world. I'm sure she misses her Indiana Johnny. What a man.

Johnny and Aurie were in the Congo around the same time that the Sutherlands were, but because of the different branches of our family, they didn't associate together. I think that is a huge shame. You'd think that if you were in a jungle, θological differences would fade away under a common goal.

Thanks for working when I'm not paying attention.

When He works on the left hand, I cannot behold Him;
      When He turns to the right hand, I cannot see Him
But He knows the way that I take;
     When He has tested me, I shall come forth as gold. 

How do I even begin?

This time next week. It will all be over. I have been on such a journey these last four years. Ups/\Downs.

Explaining everything isn't easy. So, I found a word. Eben-Ezer. Stone of Help.

My Father has been my Eben-Ezer, and He will be in the future. This morning on my way to a family gathering. I recalled every semester, major event, circumstance. Somehow, the harder things were... the more beautiful everything seems now.

Heather, Ethan, and I were hanging out last night. I am going to miss them so much. Ethan dropped me off at Murphy the other night after I was at their appartment, and I just was struck with how great my Father has been to me--providing two such friends. We're going to be really far apart soon. I am having trouble not tearing up just thinking about it.

This morning I was reminded how much I need to enjoy my life right now. In these last few days, I need to soak up joy, reflect faithfulness, and smile.

Wondering what's in store is just too big of a task.

Thank you for being apart of my college days--my life--me.

I never would have thought I'd be sad to leave, but I am. And, I am so thankful to be. It's ok to be sad. May 5th is the end of an era, the beginning of ___________.

"College is the best time of your life" Maybe that's true, but for completely different reason...

"I suppose we'll get used to being grownup in time," said Anne cheerfully. "There won't be so many unexpected things about it by and by -- though, after all, I fancy it's the unexpected things that give spice to life. We're eighteen, Diana. In two more years we'll be twenty. When I was ten I thought twenty was a green old age."
Anne of the Island

I remember how I felt the night I "graduated" from the 8th grade. I sat on my mother's vanity mirror chair and cried. A dollar bill hiding tears. The Tasty 29 Diner. The Dixie Chicks. Milkshakes.

Time is marked by rites of passage. I'm about to pass one.

"There's always another bend in the road."

I'm glad my road bends in August. :)